Arts Family Tree

...Frank found himself entering a wide doorway into what appeared to be Art's apartment. He had just been on the most unsettling ride of his life, with crazy Art behind the wheel battling traffic. Anything could happen. As he walked through the doorway Frank could not help but feel appreciation for its ample size. (Constructors built the doors extra wide these days, to accommodate society's obese majority) Yes, Frank was a little on the wide side - but most men were fat so it did not matter. Women on the other hand were extremely skinny, rather sickly looking. Its labeled the Jack Sprat in reverse Syndrome.

...However ample Frank might be, Art was not. Indeed, looking at him Frank did not need to wonder why. The reason Art was so thin was because he was too active. Why, Frank would be appalled if he were Art's size! Besides, girls thought that fat guys were "cool" - at least this was Franks opinion. (The fact that Art had been married and he hadn't did not cross his mind) Remember reader, this is Franks ideas about things, not mine. And he lives in the twenty third century.
...Back to the story...

..."So, is this where you live Art?" Frank asked to start some conversation. Art was really starting to creep him out. "Yep, I've lived here my whole life, like my daddy and my granddaddy before me." Art replied. "You've got to be kidding me - your Grandpa lived here?" Frank gasped. "Oh yeah", Art continued while shoving a stack of pizza boxes out of their way, "And I don't even like pizza!" Frank looked disbelievingly at the stack of pizza boxes about twenty five high - even larger than his stack at home - "If you don't like pizza somebody around here sure does."

..."Somebody did," corrected Art, "It was my Grandfather". "Good grief" cried Frank, "You don't mean to tell me that you've kept them around this long!" Art smiled that queer slow smile Frank had come to know. "I'm an archeologist in some ways Frank, besides, I dare not throw them away lest I loose a clue"... "A clue to what?" Frank said, trying to comprehend his weird and increasingly weirder friend.

...Art did not answer him directly, "Sit down Frank, I want to show you something". So Frank took a seat in one of Art's overstuffed yellow arm chairs. It was comfy and he felt the urge to doze, especially when Art disappeared into another room and did not return. The clock ticked mechanically, its funny that Art should still have an analog he thought. Maybe it was just a decoration, or maybe it had belonged to Art's Grandfather and he kept it for sentimental reasons - after the pizza boxes Frank wouldn't doubt it. A fly buzzed on and on, making such a droning noise that Frank found it impossible to keep his eyes open. He fell asleep.

...Art finally emerged from his energetic rummaging in the other room, only to find that his friend was snoring. "Frank, Frank, wake up buddy" he said gently tapping his friends shoulder. Franks tired eyes flew open, "Sorry Art, I couldn't help myself!" he apologized. " No P", Art said sitting in the yellow chairs mate. "So what do you have to show me?" Frank asked. "Its my family tree, on a high definition 3D DVD." Frank was impressed, not with the fact it was 3D, but because Art had a family tree. "That's cool, how far does it go back?" he asked. "Five generations, all the way back to my great-great-great- Grandpa Arthur, the guy I'm named for."

...Art reached over, popped the DVD in and picked up a remote. Frank got the feeling that he was about to meet a whole family of Arts and wandered if he was up to it, and Art never did anything half way."Let me introduce the folks to you Frank, meet the family" Art said with pride...